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After my death our beloved Church abroad will break three ways ... first the Greeks will leave us as they were never a part of us ... then those who live for this world and its glory will go to Moscow ... what will remain will be those souls faithful to Christ and His Church. ~St. Philaret of NY






Fr. Seraphim's visit to Jordanville 1979

Main purpose of the trip was to give a talk at St. Herman Youth Pilgrimage

During his visit to Jordanville in 1979, Fr. Seraphim noted in his journal some things about then-bishop Laurus and then-father Hilarion.  I've highlighted the references without regard to whether it is innocent or ominous.


90 Across the Country
(from a chapter in Not of This World)

...It so happened that during (1979) Fr. Seraphim was to make a pilgrimage to Holy Trinity Monastery, staying there for five days.  This was to be the farthest trip of his life.  With his monastic proclivity to work out his salvation in one place, it is doubtful that he would have made this trip at all had he not been invited to give lectures at the Holy Trinity Monastery’s annual “St. Herman Pilgrimage” on December 12/25.  The priest who wrote him asked him to give two lectures: one called “Orthodoxy in the USA," and another called “Mixed Marriages: How They Affect the Church.”  Fr. Seraphim agreed to give the former, but understandably declined the latter. 

...By the time of Fr. Seraphim’s pilgrimage to Jordanville, the great Orthodox thinkers and writers there  – Archbishop Averky, Archimandrite Constantine, I. M. Andreyev – had already reposed.  The righteous Archbishop Andrew (Fr. Adrian) of New Diveyevo Convent in New York had also died only six months before, (June 29/July 12, 1979).  Fr. Seraphim was to take his favorite mode of transportation – a train- –  all the way across the United States.  Before he left, Fr. Herman gave him the obedience of keeping a journal of his trip.  This journal, the most detailed record we have of a segment of Fr. Seraphim's life, provides a very insightful picture of who he was and what motivated him at this time, less than three years before his death. 

From the journal:


December 3/16, 1979
     After the All-night Vigil in the Redding Church of the Most Holy Theotokos “Surety of Sinners," and an abundant meal afterwards, early Sunday morning Father Herman, Br. Theophil, and Sisters Maria, Nancy, and Solomonia saw me (Fr. Seraphim) off at the train depot.  All promised to be obedient to Father Herman in my absence and to pray for my trip.  Several of the sisters expressed the idea that the trip would be important for what I could say to help put the right spiritual “tone” in the church atmosphere among the Russian youth  –  the tone of struggle, simplicity, sobriety, and not the cold “correctness” that is so tempting to converts.  I will be speaking about these very things.  May God help me!
     A slight accident marked the beginning of the trip.  Before I could find my seat in the train, I bumped my suitcase against a chair and it opened. spilling everything.  A small temptation from the evil one!  In a few minutes I gathered everything together in the dark and sat down.
     My seat companion was a young black boy, and in the morning we had a little talk before he left the train at Davis in order to catch a bus to his home in Fairfield.  In the dark I slept with my feet on his basketball, and it turns out he has an athletic scholarship to a Christian Bible college in Portland.  His name is Richard Clark ... a very quiet and polite young man, a freshman.  I told him a little of myself and my trip and gave him an Orthodox Word, telling him to write if he ever had any questions about Orthodoxy, and asking him to pray for my trip.  My first encounter thus was one with the freshness and innocence that still remains in America.
     A three-hour wait in the Oakland Amtrak Depot was occupied with letters to Fr. Sergei Kornic, Fr. Alexey Young, and Fr. Herman; with a small meal; and with thoughts on whether I can say what is needed in Jordanville, and whether the youth is ready to listen...
     The train went with little incident through California.  In the car one woman pointed to me and said: “Ayatollah!”*. . .  (Ayatollah Khomeini, an Iranian Muslim leader with a long gray beard, was at that time very much in the news,)
     After supper, about on the Nevada border, a young woman with her child greeted me  –  her husband is Greek Orthodox.  The young man sitting behind me heard this and moved next to me, and there began a conversation of several hours on Christianity and religion.  He is a disillusioned Protestant, learning Russian in order to be able to go to a land where Christians are persecuted and hopefully are not hypocrites as in the West.  He asked many questions, being an ex-charismatic, and I finally gave him Orthodoxy and the Religion of the Future to read.


December 4/17, Monday 
     The whole day we were travelling through Wyoming, a vast state with nothing but frozen, barren hills, and a few small cowboy towns.  Why couldn't the smoke of Orthodox prayers go up from this still almost-virgin land?  Through much of this landscape I talked more with my young friend, Mark Comstock, who had read and liked the chapter on the “charismatic” movement.  He got off the train in the middle of Wyoming, taking a copy of the book and promising to visit our monastery (he lives in Auburn in the Sierras)...
     The rest of the day I worked on my talk for Jordanville.  May God bless my words and help me to speak for the profit of souls!
     I had supper in the dining car, sitting with a mechanic from Oregon and an urbane Anglican from San Diego.  The people on trains all seem quite polite and civilized.


December 5/ I8, Tuesday
     I awoke after dawn going through Iowa.  From Nebraska on (which we passed through last night) it is clearly another part of America – large towns, with very serious farm communities, not the empty, wild west.  I like Iowa very much – old-fashioned houses, with the fertile land the obvious center of daily life, and no temporary houses and projects as in California.
     At ten a.m. we crossed the vast Mississippi, half filled with ice.  Actually, it’s only about twice as wide here as our own Sacramento [River]...
     At 1:25 p.m., just on time, the train arrived in Chicago.  The two hours before the connecting train to Cleveland were spent in writing postcards, taking a brief look outside the depot in Chicago, and calling Fr. Theodore [Jurewicz] in Cleveland....


December 7/20, Thursday
     I spent the day with Fr. Theodore, who gives an impression of light- mindedness but is actually a very serious young priest (just 30 years old).  His children keep him busy, but he still has time for painting icons  –  where his heart obviously lies.  For much of the day his young catechumen David was with us – a very quiet, serious young man (18 years old) who wants to be a monk.  Fr. Theodore is preparing him for baptism at Christmas.  Fr. Theodore took me to his old and new (not yet completed) churches, which were somewhat as in the dream I had of them several weeks ago...
     In the evening about twelve parishioners gathered to hear an impromptu talk.... A summary of my talk on the subject of our identity as Orthodox Christians:

    Who are we?  Does it really make any difference that we are Orthodox Christians rather than Protestants or Roman Catholics, Moslems or Buddhists, or unbelievers?
     This question arises because of some tragic cases in which Orthodox young people leave the Orthodox Church.  There was a Greek Orthodox girl, daughter of an Orthodox priest in northern California, who evidently didn’t bother to find out what her Church teaches, and joined the community of an evangelist of the so-called “Church of Christ.”  He had ideas of communes and appealed to her idealism.  She followed him to South America to find a new way of life in a town named after the evangelist – Jonestown.  Probably you all know what happened there just one year ago.  What is to stop our Orthodox young people from doing things like this?
     Another example: a young Russian boy who grew up in New jersey.  He attended church frequently but didn't really know why he was Orthodox and not something else, or what Orthodoxy is.  Having no firm identity and faith to guide him, he easily fell in with what people around him were doing.  By the age of 18 he had already married and divorced and was into drugs.  I met him then – a basically normal Russian boy, but not quite certain what he was.  The next year he was in jail for selling drugs.  Within three or four years drugs had become a habit, leading to paralysis.  A few months ago he died, bitter and cursing God.  Why? – because he didn't know who he was, or what Orthodoxy is.
     Another example: in San Francisco, a few blocks from one of our Russian Orthodox churches on California Street. is a house painted black; inside is a temple of satan.  Recently some sociology professors and students at the University of California at Berkeley made a study of the regular members of this “temple."  They found that one of the largest groups of people who belonged were sons and daughters of Russian Orthodox parents; and their theory is that Russian Orthodox children, if hey are not fully aware of their own faith, are easier than others to convert to satanism, because their religion is so demanding, and if they don’t fulfill its demands their souls feel an emptiness.
     Many people don't realize it, but religion is the most powerful thing in human life.  The world is now undergoing what one might call a “religious revival” – but most of it is false religion.  Young people, including Russian and other Orthodox young people. are bowing down and worshipping idols in Hindu temples, living "gods" like Maharaj – ji; are meditating in Zen and other pagan temples throughout America; and are committing themselves to fanatical “religious” leaders like Jom Jones – why?
     I'd like to say a word about my own experience.  I was a religious seeker like many young people today – Zen. etc.  Then I went to a Russian church for the first time – l felt something then but didn't know until later that this was grace.  I met a holy bishop (Archbishop John) and read much about Orthodoxy, its teachings and saints.  Finally I became a monk, and went with a young Russian fellow-seeker (and finder) to a wilderness area in northern California to try to imitate in a small way what we had read of desert-loving monks in Russia, and also to continue printing The Orthodox Word which Archbishop John had blessed.  As far away as we are from towns and Orthodox people, this past year and a half we have baptized ten people in our monastery (in a week during the summer).  And there are four new catechumens.  Examples: the guitar-player George, converted by his guitar teacher, a Russian boy, through his icons.  Girls from a Protestant community in northern California.  A college student converted by reading church history (the Ecumenical Councils. etc.).  One new catechumen’s wife is a typical American with a Texas burger stand.  What brings them to Orthodoxy? – The grace of God.  Many young Orthodox people are losing faith, and God is calling others in.  We should become serious about our faith.
     And what of Russia today? There is a tremendous revival of interest in Orthodoxy after sixty years of deprivation.  People are being baptized by the thousands; some don't even know why they are being drawn to the Church – the grace of God is operating.
     What is happening in Russia today is an example and inspiration to us.  An example is Fr. Dimitry Dudko, who spent 8½ years in a concentration camp, suffering much.  He gave talks at Vigil services; his legs were broken; he was warned not to talk, because Orthodoxy is dangerous to the government.  Other examples: Nun Valeria, Vladimir Osipov, Alexander Ogorodnikov.  We should begin helping them: by prayer, by helping with "Orthodox Action," (A society started by Archbishop John) by sending letters (some addresses are in The Orthodox Word).

     Aer the talk there was a lively discussion. At midnight Fr. Theodore and David took me to the train depot.  The train was an hour late, and we drank coffee together before I left.  I was deeply touched by this simple, struggling priest in our American wasteland.  Fr. Theodore urged me to visit him again on the way back to California.


December 8/21, Friday 
     About 8:00 in the morning I was met by Fr. Laurence (Fr. Seraphim's godson, the former Br. Lawrence, who had lived for three years at the St. Herman Monastery) with one of Bp. Laurus’ cars.  As we drove the twenty miles to Jordanville I was somewhat apprehensive about what I would find there – perhaps some coldness and criticism.  Fr. Laurence warned me on the way not to talk too much about Archbishop John, so it wouldn’t seem I was "bragging," like Archbishop Andrew [Fr. Adrian] "bragged" about knowing Elder Nektary.  This caused me more apprehension, even though I had not intended to speak of Archbishop John at all.
     We arrived at Jordanville just before noon. I went first to Bp. Laurus' office for a short talk, then to Fr. Vladimir in the office.  Then Br. Gregory showed me the church, and we came to the refectory a little late for lunch.  The informality of the refectory was a little disconcerting at first. with everyone freely reaching for whatever he wanted, but I soon grew used to it.  Fr. Panteleimon (One of the founders of Jordanville monastery reposed in 1984) and Fr. Anthony welcomed me very warmly, as did Fr. Gury and Fr. Germogen, and later Fr. Michael Pomazansky.  There was only an inch or two of snow at Jordanville, but the day of my arrival was quite co[d – 5°.  It began to warm up the next day, and the snow soon meIted – unusual for this time of year.
     After lunch and a rest (by order from Fr. Vladimir) I was taken on a tour of the monastery by Fr. Laurence – library, printshop, bindery, office, barn, vegetable storage, sheds, woodworking shop, seminary – a vast enterprise, with everyone knowing his place.
     No one “falls over” me here; I am left pretty much to myself, except when someone wants to talk to me.  I got some books from the bookshop today – free from Fr. Vladimir.  In the evening, after supper, there was Compline and evening prayers with the moving veneration of all icons by the whole community.  But in general I am not “overwhelmed” by the beautiful Jordanville chanting – it is as though I have heard it all through Fr. Herman's accounts.
     At night Fr. Peter Herrin left a note on my door to come and see him across the hall.  He wants to come to us in Platina in order to “do” more for the Orthodox mission.  He is still immature, but I understand his point well – here everyone knows his place and works hard at it, but no one gets very “inspired” or has the “excitement" we know in our missionary labors.  I told him to pray and to write Fr. Herman.
     I visited Fr. Macarius today – unfortunately, he is rather bored and sleepy; the “low key” atmosphere does not inspire him.
     A Serb, Todor, visited me – he is a “zealot” who is interested in our monastery, but I rather discouraged him by telling him we eat three times .1 day, etc.
     I had a little talk with Alyosha, a young idealistic seminarian from the Soviet Union; he wants to have Orthodoxy and the Religion of the Future’ translated into Russian.
     After evening prayers, I attended an English Akathist in the basement church, led by Fr. Ioannikios"‘ for a few converts. (Fr. Ioannikios was a friend and correspondent of Fr. Seraphim.  His attempts to institute more English services at Holy Trinity Monastery unfortunately met with resistance and were finally abandoned.)


December 9/22, Saturday
     At 5:00 a.m. a sepulchral voice awakened: “Now is the hour of prayer. Lord Jesus Christ God, have mercy on us!" Then a loud buzzer to make sure we get up.  Although exhausted, I do make it to church.  After morning prayers and Nocturnes I begin to venerate the icons with the monks [who are leaving], and have to be told by Vladika Laurus that these are the working monks, and I should stay.
     Today I have talks with Vladika Laurus, Fr. Hilarion (formerly Igor Kapral), and Fr. loannikios.  Our problems with the Boston line are discussed a little, but nothing is decided except that everyone wants to avoid fights.  It’s obvious the Boston “pull" has ended here for most people, but one must still “take Boston into consideration” and watch what one says.  One wishes there were more of an actual “Jordanville line” to answer Boston with – but perhaps the present atmosphere is about as good as one can expect...
     At 4:00 p.m. there are Ninth Hour, Small Vespers, Compline, and the Rule before Communion.  Fr. Ignaty has me read the Canon to the Guardian Angel.
     After supper at 6:00, the Vigil begins at 7:00 p.m.  I have been provided with Br. Eugene’s klobuk (which he laments he can’t wear yet) and join the right kliros, harmonizing with Fr. Ignaty (I can't sing as high as he does).  The Vigil ends at 11:00 p.m.  The singing is excellent, but somehow, even participating in it, I am remote and detached from it.  Apparently I’m just not a “people" person – my heart is in the quiet wilderness, though by my deeds I am no desert-dweller at all.


December 10/23, Sunday 
     After Nocturnes at 8:00, Liturgy begins at 9:30 with the meeting of the bishop.  As usual, I become confused what to do and come out late to greet the bishop.  I serve together with seven other priests.
     Shortly after lunch I am to have a talk for novices and seminarians, but others show up also.

     Talk to Jordanville Seminarians and Novices:     
     I see here future pastors, monks, zealous Orthodox Christians and pilgrims.  Who are you?  What is your identity?  You should be those who realize what Orthodox Christianity is all about and what it means to be Orthodox.  Here no one is going to force any of you to have this realization – you have to do it yourself.  It's good to think about this from time to time.  Are you ready to do what St. Peter says: to give an account of your faith to those without?  Once I was picked up on the road to Platina, and at the end of the ride I was asked: can you tell me what Russian Orthodoxy is in five minutes?  Maybe you won’t ever have precisely this experience, but something similar may happen to you – and you must be prepared to answer with something deeper than beards and black robes.  Often people can find out about faith by very small things – you make the sign of the Cross before eating, or have an icon that someone sees – and people begin to ask you about Faith.
     Here are some questions you may be Faced with in life:
     1. Why shouldn't I commit suicide?  Many young people now do, because there is no meaning in their life.  Can you tell them the meaning of life?...  Maybe you know about some externals of Christianity – but can you tell what you believe in such a way that someone else might be convinced and saved by it? – This is apologetics, a theology course which is taught in the seminary.
     2. Why shouldn’t I join a cult? – Zen, Jim Jones, Hare Krishna, the Moonies. etc.  What's wrong with them?  You will have a course in comparative religion – but you’ll have to take it seriously in order to answer such questions.  You’ll have to know what is true and what is false religion.
     3. What's wrong with "born-again" or “charismatic" Christians?  If people around you are against them, you'll say they are bad – but you’ll never convince anyone who is involved in them unless you yourself [understand] what is wrong with them.  Do you know that people like this – at least some of them – are hungering for Orthodoxy?  I know some people like this who were so moved on hearing someone give an account of why he was Orthodox that they came to church and were converted.
     In our times you can’t just be Orthodox because your parents were, or because you live in an Orthodox community – you have to have a conscious faith and be ready at any time to give an account of it.  And you have to be precise about what Orthodoxy is...
     I hope you will concentrate especially on one thing: the living Orthodox word I know Protestants who say: your Orthodox faith is dead.  Your services are in a foreign language, with empty rituals, and nobody prays in church.  Of course, this is a superficial judgment – but it can be true of many of us.
     St. John of Kronstadt is an example of someone who was constantly waking people up.  He loved to read Canons and stop to comment on them.  Everything he did was living.
     The whole of salvation is given to us in our Orthodox church services and prayers – but unless we put our hearts to it, these will be dead for us.
     How are you to become informed?  You must start paying attention, going deeper into what goes on around you.  You have readings of Lives of Saints at meal times, telling about men who lived like angels.  People in the world don't even hear of such things – but you have the opportunity if you open your ears.
     St. John Chrysostom teaches that it is impossible to be saved without reading spiritual books.  Of course, there are exceptions for those in prison camps and the like.  But if you have the opportunity and don't use it, what answer will you be able to give?
     Which books? – Abba Dorotheos, Unseen Warfare, St. John of Kronstadt, Fr. Dimitry Dudko (Our Hope).
     The world is waking up to the treasure of the Orthodoxy which we already have.  St. Seraphim’s prophecy of Russia’s resurrection is beginning to happen today... 

     Towards the end of my talk Vladika Laurus entered together with the Russian writer Soloukhin (author of “Dark Boards,” about ancient icons), who then gave a brief talk and answered questions.  He is somewhat religious, sometimes goes to church in Moscow (“we are all baptized"), and spoke of changes for the better in Russia, which make possible his books (which are “secular” appreciation of religious things).  His next book is “Optina Hermitage," due to appear in Moscow in January; he has not read Kontzevitch’s book, but plans to read it now.  He ended his talk with good comments on modern art (“You can have a poem without rhyme, or without rhythm, or even without meaning – but not without all three in the same poem!") which show that Russian art, after all, has preserved something of the traditional principles of art...


December 11/24, Monday 
     At 3:00 p.m., the first meeting of the Pilgrimage took place in the Seminary hall.  I sat with Fr. Cyprian at the head table and translated his talk with questions and answers afterwards... 
     At the Vigil I was chief celebrant, which made me nervous as usual, and I made many mistakes.  Truly, I am no “professional,” and this is probably best for me.  Some of the stichera were sung in English.
     After the Vigil Fr. Ioannikios visited me in my cell (he had conducted me to the cemetery on Saturday) and told of some of his sorrows and difficulties.  Truly he has a difficult time and is not getting the spiritual help he needs.


December 12/25, Tuesday   The Feast of St. Herman
     After rather little sleep, I went at 7:00 in the morning to serve Proskomedia; I was rather more apprehensive about serving than I was about speaking later on, but all went well and I didn’t make too many mistakes...  Twelve priests served....  The service was very triumphant, with a rousing sermon by Fr. Valery at the end, comparing St. Herman with St. Seraphim.  During the sermon Vladika Laurus blessed me to bless the icons of St. Herman I had brought with me, and I distributed them to all the pilgrims when they came to kiss the Cross.
     Shortly after lunch everyone met in the Seminary hall, and after Fr. George’s introduction and Vladika Laurus' greeting words, I gave my talk ["Orthodoxy in the U.S.A.”"] – mostly reading from my text, but also adding some things as I went along.  About 130 people were present, and all listened quite attentively.  (Complete text of this talk was published in Orthodox Word #94 September 1980)
     There was a lively discussion [afterwards] concerning how to preserve one’s Orthodoxy, which showed a serious response from many.  Need was expressed by several people for Lives of Saints for children, which perhaps seems to be one of the great needs of today.
     After the discussion Fr. George described briefly our monastery and the good, quiet feeling he had there, and then showed a few slides he had taken on his visit.  Fr. Vladimir Malchenko then showed slides of his visit to Mt. Athos, especially of the abandoned Russian sketes which are falling into ruin.  Vladika Laurus ended the Pilgrimage with words of thanks and appreciation – all in a very “low key.”  Several people came up to talk to me afterwards, including a young Protestant convert...  Many books from the Monastery bookstore were on display, and some people took addresses from Keston College for writing to Orthodox people in Russia and Romania.
     [Later] Fr. Valery took me to his cell (the “Metropolitan’s Room") and talked with me about . . . the do-nothingness and bad feeling at the Synod (Headquarters). This is truly a bad symptom of the state of our church life.
     After supper and Compline, Br. Eugene came to visit me in my cell.  He seems sad, and expressed dissatisfaction at the looseness of life in the Monastery.  I told him not to think too highly of himself.
     Fr. Hilarion came by to ask me if he could print my talk in Orthodox Life, and then Fr. David, a young ryassophore monk, came by for a long discussion on “fanaticism" and on making Orthodoxy accessible to ordinary Americans.  We discussed the word “Christmas,” “label-readers" who warn you of the ingredients of cookies‘ (I told him it was all right to read labels for yourself, but not for others), the new “super-zealous” attitude of the Ipswich parish which is changing from Russian to Greek music because only it is “correct” and prayerful, etc.  We agreed on almost everything – I was encouraged by his “normal" attitude towards church matters. 
     There were discussions in the refectory about my talk (I heard later) until late at night; evidently it roused much interest...


December I3/26, Wednesday
     Having gone to bed at 1:00 a.m. I slept through the early service, intending to go to Liturgy.  But somehow I thought the bells for Liturgy were the call to Matins, and I came to church only when everything was finished.  I went to bid farewell to Vladiika Laurus, to Fr. Hilarion, and others, and had a nice talk with Br. Thomas and Philip Graham, son of the deacon in Ipswich, who is troubled by the “super-correct" tendency in the parish.  The young people here have a very normal view of these things – a good sign.
     After serving a Litia at the tombs of Metropolitan Anastassy and Archbishop Tikhon (I thought it was the sepulchre of Archbishop Averky, which I actually didn't see), I left with my godfather Dimitry for the next leg of my journey.
     My stay at Jordanville was very rewarding, although I feel I would wither away in this atmosphere.  Many here suffer from the “don't do anything extraordinary” atmosphere – a certain deadness and boredom is present; and there is not enough inspiration or even appreciation of what is given here – even the Lives of Saints are read at trapeza in such a matter of fact way that they are scarcely heard, and Vladika Laurus deliberately refuses giving comments or interpretations.  People here are “carrying on,” and many survive this treatment and become fruitful; but I doubt I could survive it.  Our mission in Platina is a different one.
     Late in the morning Dimitry and I finally set out, going through the more scenic parts of New York State to New Diveyevo.  We stayed only an hour here, and I briey visited Mothers Serama, Gavrila, Maria, and Sr. Daria, and then the tomb of Vladika Andrew [Fr. Adrian]. . ..
     We arrived at Dimirry’s home in Liberty Corner, a pleasant small town with a semi-rural atmosphere, just in time for supper.  I met his family for the first time, including my godson Nicholas, who is retarded and is interested in nothing but the Church and becoming a monk.  It is a good, pious family, with two normal Russian girls, their mother and grandmother.
     After supper we went to the home of a fellow-parishioner not far away, where I served a short Moleben and gave a talk to the six children of the parish school on the idea of “podvig" or struggle, with examples taken from the Lives of St. Thomas the Apostle, the early martyrs, bishops, desert-dwellers, as well as contemporary missionaries in Uganda and suffering people in Russia.  Then I told about our monastery, with special emphasis on the animals, which delighted the children as well as the adults...


December 14'/27, Thursday
     This day I rested and wrote letters and postcards, not taking advantage of the offer of one man who was present the night before – to show me New York and the Synod [headquarters].  In the evening about twelve Russians came, now parishioners of the New Brunswick parish....  I gave a talk to these people (in English) about podvig, about suffering Russia and its religious revival, about Fr. Dimitry Dudko, about Africa and its missions...


December 15/28, Friday
     Another day of rest for me, and then, after noon, Dimitry and I set out for Pennsylvania to visit Fr. Demetrios Serfes, who had called me at Jordanville and wanted very much to see me.  We spent the afternoon driving through the pleasantly rolling Pennsylvania countryside (also Amish country), stopping in Harrisburg (on the impressive Susquehanna River) to pick up my railroad ticket from New York to Cleveland, arriving at dusk at Ft. Demetrios’ apartment in the small town of Mt. Holly Springs...
     After supper with Fr. Demetrios (whom Dimitry had met before), we went at 7:00 p.m. to his church, a nicely converted Protestant church with good iconostasis and icons, for a Paraclesis – the Canon to the Mother of God, which we read alternately.  Fr. Demetrios does not sing too well, so I sang the stichera to the Russian melodies, and the people sang responses in Greek style.
     After the Moleben I gave a talk right in church for the fifteen or so people who came (including children).  The title was: Orthodoxy of the Heart.  I spoke, usual, about struggle, about appreciating the treasure and the freedom we have, about suffering Russia and our opportunity to help the Orthodox Christians there (I handed out some names), about the dangers of our “spirituality with comfort," about making our Orthodoxy something of the heart, not just the mind.  There was a good response – people asked serious questions about how to preserve their Orthodox faith for themselves and their children.  I talked also about the pitfalls of “correctness” and not applying Orthodoxy to our own level.
     After leaving church, we returned to Fr. Demetrios’ apartment (which is just a mile or two from church) and finished our supper and discussion... Dimitry was tired and went to bed, and Fr. Demetrios and I continued talking until 3:00 or 4:00 in the morning.  He is much less simple than I had imagined and is quite aware of differences in the Church.  He felt me out on a few points – I explained, for example, about Archbishop Theophan of Poltava...


Three Pillars of Orthodoxy Parish House
Mt. Holly Springs, Pennsylvania


December 16/29, Saturday
     After a few hours’ sleep, we had breakfast at the “Holly Inn," which is owned by Greek parishioners of Fr. Demetrios.  Only towards noon did we finally depart, with good impressions of this little Orthodox outpost, for the trip to [Fr. Valery Lukianov’s church in] Lakewood [New Jersey].  We were delayed by traffic around Philadelphia, and finally arrived in Lakewood only around 4:00 in the afternoon.  If I had come in the morning I could have spoken to the children in the school, but it didn’t work out that way.
     The All-night Vigil began at 5:00 p.m., and I served and then helped Fr. Valery with confessions.  This was the Sunday when everyone was supposed to receive Communion, so there were over a hundred coming to confession.  A few had real problems, and I tried to help them as best I could.  After service we had supper, and then to bed.  Fr. Valery's welcome was most warm, and it was good to meet his matushka [wife] and children also.


December 17/30, Sunday 
     In the morning I helped again with confessions, then concelebrated with Fr. Valery...  I gave the sermon on the Gospel – many are called but few are chosen.
     After Liturgy there was a meal in the immense church hall next door (where the church school also is located), and then I gave my talk.
     I spoke first in Russian, telling of the history and the present state ofour monastery, then spoke in English to the young people on treasuring and going more deeply into their faith. I gave examples of Orthodox young people who have gone astray, of other Orthodox young who sought for truth outside the faith and then returned, and then of Protestants who have been converted to Orthodoxy.
     Then I finished with some words for the Russian-speaking adults...
     After the talk a few people came up to talk to me.  One of them has a son who has gone through Buddhism, drugs, etc., then wanted to return to Orthodoxy but was put off by Fr. Mardarios who told him he had to repent at least a year and a half before returning to Communion; and now he is studying at Oral Roberts University to become a missionary for the down and out such as he had been.  I told the man to tell his son to visit us. 
     After a warm farewell from Fr. Valery, and accompanied by the ringing of the church bells by Fr. Valery’s children (Which was very touching). Dimitry and I left... 
     We arrived at Grand Central Station with fteen minutes to spare; I spent five minutes in this city [i.e., New York City] and had no particular desire to see more.  I bade farewell to Dimitry and set off on the return journey.


December 18/31, Monday
     I arrived at 8:00 a.m. in Cleveland and barely got off in time with all my baggage.  Fr. Theodore was there to meet me, and I spent the day with him at home.  He is in a way an image of our Orthodoxy in America for me – a shy young man doing his duty as best he can, not expecting much, no great “missionary” but quietly standing for the faith.  May God grant him strength and spiritual fruit.  His catechumen David spent most of the day with us, and I was able to say a little to him.  At 6:00 p.m. we had the Vigil in English, and one family came besides David.


December 19/January 1, Tuesday
     At 4:00 a.m. I celebrated the Divine Liturgy with Fr. Theodore as choir... It was a moving “Catacomb” service which refreshed us both.  In such small, unexpected ways as this perhaps we can keep alive our faith.
     After a cup of coffee Fr. Theodore saw me off, and my pilgrimage was really at an end.
     I caught my train on time in Chicago, after a wait of several hours in the Chicago depot.  I ate in the diner with someone from Daytonville, but had no “missionary encounters.”


December 20/January 2, Wednesday
     St. John of Kronstadt. A quiet day on the train writing this journal and starting an article on the Shroud of Turin. Dinner in the dining car, but only polite interest shown in Orthodoxy by my table companions – a woman from Watsonville with her son and daughter.


December 21/January 3, Thursday
     The last day of my journey.  The most impressive scenery of the whole way is the California Sierras.  The eastern side is filled with deep snow, but the western slope is warm (67°) and bare.  Perhaps the winter will not be so bad in Platina after all.
     After passing through the Sierras, I did have a “missionary encounter.”  A young, long-haired (but beardless) man named Rick sat next to me and said he wanted to “check me out" spiritually.  He is from a Fundamentalist family in Chicago and has been living in Denver, going to meetings of a cult called “Urantia” – meditation, the search for truth, etc.  He is going to San Francisco to go deeper into this cult and look for whatever else he can find spiritually.  I warned him about going astray spiritually, told him a little about us and Archbishop john and told him to go to Vladika John’s Sepulchre and to ask his help to find the right way.  He said: “Why should I ask someone else when I can talk to God?"  I replied: “Because he’s closer to God than you are and can help you.”  I invited him to visit us and gave him the last two Orthodox Words had: on Andreyev, and the 1978 Pilgrimage.  He thanked me and left.  A self-centered and independent young man; may the little seed I sowed sprout later and come to his rescue!


     Conclusions from the trip: It was fruitful in contacts; there are quiet strugglers in many places, and it is good that we help each other.
     No one has such opportunities as we do for printing what is needed for today's Orthodox strugglers.  We must do more.  A few may join us; we should be better organized and prepared for them.  Our sisters also must be better directed to a path of fruitfulness.
     We must and are in a position to be leaders in setting the tone for our Orthodox strugglers today – a tone not of “correctness” but of heartfelt Orthodoxy.  May God grant us the strength and wisdom!


• Archimandrite Nektarios (Fr. Demetrios Serfes), in 2005 wrote down his recollections of his visit with Fr. Seraphim which he posted on his website.
• "Orthodoxy in USA" talk published in Orthodox Word issue #94
http://startingontheroyalpath.blogspot.com/2009/08/hello.html
• Dimitri Langeron, (signature below Fr. Seraphim's), briefly mentioned the visit in a life he wrote probably not too long before the publication of Not of This World in 1993.
• photo shared by GOC parishioner in Pennsylvania  • original size 17.78x12.78 here: